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the dream is ruined; the stardust girl is shattered

Elesa is a lot of things. Her friends say it is as if she has a closet full of personalities, ready to mold into whatever she’s needed to be. She’s a shining model and a feared gym leader and Skyla’s pillar of support. But she’s still somehow lost herself in the stardust, and Elesa isn’t quite sure who she is anymore.

Her favorite artist is a lanky man with a habit of being erratic, to say the least. His name is Burgh and he is everything that she hates. He is an artist, and she met him at a fashion shoot. It was strange, seeing such a different face in the crowd, seeing herself being portrayed on such a different medium.

He furiously sketches her on pieces of sketchbook paper, messy scratches that convey her in an array of lines. She stays still long enough for him to get her basic form, and she thinks he is crazy. Then her portrait is put in Studio Castelia, a large painting with vibrant colors and a sense of realism that Elesa hasn’t seen in any photograph, and she thinks he is a genius.

Burgh draws her because she is fascinating. She is a supernova of contradictions and he is intrigued. When he meets her, he thinks he is among a god, until she opens her mouth. Her words are harsher than imagined, and she sounds so broken, so shattered.

Burgh thinks it makes her all the more beautiful.

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one day I'm going to rewrite this. today is not that day.

(aka a story written for my ninth grade english class)

the story of a runaway girl and a bus ticket to Maine )
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summary: it’s too late when he thinks he’s probably in love with her
characters/relationships: auruopetra, levipetra, eren
notes: this was supposed to be some sort of angsty auruopetra but it turned into a character study with implied levipetra. cross-posted at ao3
he watches her get slammed against the tree, blood splattering and bones cracking. )
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summary: and boom goes the dynamite
characters: akashi-centric (+gom)
series: these were our glory days
notes: ummm ok so. chronologically this takes place before Bubble Economy so yeah. excitement. also, wow. these character studies are fun to write.
akashi seijuurou doesn't know when it happened. )
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characters: generation of miracles, momoi satsuki
summary: though very subtle, it was obvious all the same—they were bitter. / classmates watch them fall apart and do nothing about it.
notes: from ao3 and
the whole thing was a sore subject for a good three months. )
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 levi, petra, and the many lives they lived after the scouting legion. — reincarnation au
characters/pairings: levipetra with cameos from from eren, armin, mikasa, hanji, mike, auruo, erd, gunther, annie, and erwin
notes: crossposted from ao3 and my writing blog

our story is gilded )
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she thinks it’s because he’s her brother’s captain, that’s why he’s so hesitant. he holds her hand delicately, like if he so much as squeezes she’ll shatter. he gets jumpy whenever she mentions rin, and the one time they nearly ran into him during a date he hid behind a trashcan for a good five minutes. she chastises him for that, because he’s the captain and he shouldn’t be cowering in fear of his own swimmers, but apparently her brother is frightening when angered. and, yes, dating his sister would result in a rather unpleasant reaction.

captain mikoshiba and mikoshiba seijuurou are very different from each other, where captain mikoshiba is strict and no-nonsense, mikoshiba seijuurou carefree and silly. still, kou thinks he’s being unreasonable.

besides that, though, she’s frustrated because this mental block of his—being downright scared of rin—means that he’s not once kissed her. she tried when they went to a festival together once, but he ended up distracting her with fried squid and festival games.

she mentions it to him, one day, when they’re sitting on a picnic blanket in the warm august sun. he turns to her, his cheeks dusted pink and tries to stutter something out. but she’s made up her mind, and she’s going to get her kiss, damn it all.

lightly, she dusts her lips against his, and he splutters.

"but gou-kun!" he says, "what if—"

she knows what he’s going to say, so she shuts him up with another kiss.

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they lie in their joint bunk, mattresses separated by less than a meter of wood. reiner and bertholdt are in the double bunk beds next to theirs, and eren and armin are below. once they’re sure everyone is asleep, they quietly push their mattresses together.

they lie next to each other, content, as jean lets himself begin to lean into marco. marco nudges his shoulder, and turns to face him. he can barely make out his friend’s face in the dark, but he can feel his breath.

he knows jean well enough to know he is biting his lip, letting his eyes dart around. he likes jean like this best, when he allows himself to let down his walls and let marco in.

it’s like this a lot with their class—hearts hardened and guarded, unwilling to let anyone get the better of them. they rarely show vulnerability these days, their childish innocence ripped away from them. marco twines his hand with jean’s and turns his head towards him.

"what’s wrong?" he whispers, immediately asking the question.

jean knows he tenses up, he can feel marco’s hand grip his a little harder. he debates replying with a snarky remark, brushing it off like it’s nothing but the question’s been bugging him for awhile.

"do you love me?" he asks, words rushed and breathless.

"yes," comes the reply without hesitation.

it’s all he needs.

curling into marco’s side, jean lets out a breath, letting his fear and worry out along with it.

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makoto watches haru twirl the water band coming out of his wand like a ribbon, as rin struggles to get a result. of course haru would be able to master a spell that produces water, he thinks as he produces his own stream of water.

aguamenti!" he hears rin shout, flicking his wand. it leaks out a thin stream of water, and the redheaded boy glares furiously. "oh, goddammit!

"it’s okay, rin," makoto tries to reason, "not everyone is gifted at charms."

rin only glares and turns himself away. he raises his head a little to glare at haruka, haruka and his goddamn gift at charms. makoto sighs, and rin waves his wand again.

he says, “aguamenti!" and a larger stream of water is produced. it doesn’t splutter like it usually does, and he flicks his hand upwards in surprise and excitement.

"yes!" he shouts, dousing everyone.

professor amakata claps her hands excitedly, as everyone else begins casting drying spells.

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the message comes at half past six.

you are unaware of everything around you, from the sounds of crickets outside your bedroom window to the punk rock band your sister is playing in the room next door. your girlfriend is sitting next to you, and your best friend is sprawled across your bed. his history textbook is covering his face, his notebook thrown across the room.

"goddamn," your girlfriend says, "is it even possible for you to read two pages without throwing something?"

your best friend lifts the book off his head, blinking down at you. he struggles to pick himself up off the bed and grins.

"no," he says, "absolutely not."

she groans and you log into your laptop. you’ve given up about an hour ago, tucking your chemistry notes away neatly and leaving a stack of your other notebooks on the floor. terribly bored, you open your email.

the screen reads, one new message and you hesitate clicking because you’ve never seen the address before, but what’s there to lose? you click, and what you find in the message keeps your eyes locked on the screen, the black numbers dancing in front of your eyes.

"what’cha doing there buddy?" your best friend says, swinging himself off your bed. "hey, natalie, what’s she doing?"

she looks over your shoulder, resting her head there.

"it’s an email," she tells him. "hey, what’s it say?"

you pull your eyes off the screen and move over, and they peer over it to look. you watch as your best friend crinkles his nose, reading the subject out loud.

"goodbye," he reads.

the countdown ends.
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cagamosis: an unhappy marriage
au where annie is not the female titan and joins the scouting legion, but eren dies.

let's get married )

wanweird: an unhappy fate
these days i don’t do much — annie/mikasa, minor mikasa/eren

she thinks that maybe this is her punishment. )

anagapesis: the feeling when one no longer loves someone they once did
these walls came crashing down — annie/mikasa

she feels it happen, because it hits her all at once. )
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the fuck you! reverberates around the jaeger family’s basement, and everyone turns their heads towards jean and eren.

it’s nothing new, having the two of them shout expletives and then throw some punches, but it’s better then pretending to watch the breakfast club for the seventh time that month. their fights are so common that even mikasa stands by the sidelines, watching them throw half-assed punches at one another.armin can hear connie’s eyeroll when he says, “oh, come on, guys, again?”

sasha’s reply comes soon after, something about boys being idiots and throwing punches is not a way of showing affection.

"i’m not fucking in love with him!” eren shouts as he pins jean’s arms behind his head. jean’s stifled agreement is met with sarcastic head-nodding and ymir calling bullshit.

this is not unusual.

after mikasa finally gives in and threatens to forcibly separate them, everyone’s attention turns back to the movie, as brain takes a drag of the joint.

there’s only twenty minutes left when the poorly concealed sounds of kissing interrupts their movie watching, and annie turns her head to find eren and jean making out with each other.

this, too, is not unusual.


October 2013

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oh, glory days
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